more comic reviews from 11/16

Avengers #19 - I am a bit of a sucker for team forming stories, so it shouldn't come as a surprise that I liked this issue which introduces the "new" Avengers team. I say it like that because really they are just out a member or two and replace them with Storm and a former Avenger who is a fan favorite who I did miss. It also seems like Spider-Man and Wolverine are off the team which is good, they are both on two other teams, Avengers will do fine without em. Now though I admit how much of a sucker I am, this issue did have some hitches, like Storm appearing and then being shoved aside mid sentence for the mystery Avenger (which is fine in and of itself but I hope this isn't how she is treated for good), and a few too many random asides and conversations that don't add much to the story, but that is Bendis for you. I do have two fanboyish gripes though, first I thought everyone forgot that Thor ever existed and was replaced perpetually by the new thunder god? If so I don't think Bendis got the message, this is the second Avengers issue post Fear Itself to discuss missing Thor, just seems like he doesn't care about the ideas of others. My other thing is that at the end a villain shows up to make a ruckus and it made me wonder, do the Avengers go out and stop evil anymore? Or does it always come to them? Besides that though, as I said I'm a sucker for these stories. 4/5

Fear Itself #7.3 - With this issue the 7 issue Fear Itself finally ends its 10 issue run. Like 7.1 and 7.2 (I hate the point system by the way) these are really just an issue of the main book of whoever is starring in the given issue (this time Iron Man) and "resolve" something doing with Fear Itself. Thus far by resolve it has meant undoing a major event, like (spoilers)


In 7.1 we find out Bucky Barnes never actually died, Nick Fury and Black Widow replaced him with a fake to force Steve Rogers to return as Cap, which understandably pisses Cap off but at the end he agrees and it ends happy. 7.2 does something similar and finishes with Thor opening his eyes.

Now in 7.3 we get another major event in Fear Itself being nullified by the definition of dues ex machina, and it pulls it off...mostly. It only works because it is built in such a way that you want the villain to pay, want horrible things to happen to them because of all the right heartstrings being pulled by the incident which gets over turned. As far as take backs go it isn't all that badly done and makes you a bit happy about it, until you really think about it. In this comic Iron Man who is the title character of this issue, doesn't do anything. He doesn't solve the problem, he just mopes and wines and contemplates murdering a defenseless man. The latter by the way becomes irrelevant later on and makes Tony seem a bit of a dick. But on first read through the book works, gets the response it wants and only after thinking about it do you find the flaws. 3/5

Walking Dead #91 - At this point in time you either read the Walking Dead or you don't. The art is great as always and the story is still moving along. This issue is a little bit more resolution and build up over the last few issues of big events. It is a breather issue while giving Sophie (who needs to be found in the show already) and Andrea (who could just die already in the show) a few good character moments. If anything my only criticism is as a stand alone issue this doesn't offer much, unlike the more recent ones, but it will work great in the trade. 4/5

Incredible Hulk #2 - I don't know what I think about Bruce Banner being an immoral mad scientist trying to get the Hulk back after seperating them. I also don't know about undoing the excellent ending to Pak's run on Hulk off panel. But it has happened and we must move on when dealing with corporate comics and I shall. The Banner parts of this story just don't jive with me. I can't see him experimenting on anything and everything due to being sad he isn't Hulk anymore, especially what he does at the end, pure evil move; I also don't see Betty/She-Hulk leaving like she does in a flashback outside of editorial mandate so she can be in the Defenders. So that part of the book doesn't work for me. The Hulk part where he fights giant sharks on the other hand, now that works! Why can't the book just be that? The mysterious government woman who keeps flirting with Hulk can die though, don't care one bit. Just give me Hulk fighting giant monsters! The art is a bit of an issue, the issue got a ton of flack for many fill in artists on this the second issue and from an Image founder at that, many jokes flew. But since Silvestri is apparently dealing with a medical problem it is very understandable. The art won't impact the final result which I'm afraid is a bit low due to Banner weirdness. 2/5

Wonder Woman #3 - Did I read a weirdly mixed issue? It felt to me like the first dozen pages were in the wrong order, I should have tried a different copy to find out for sure. Besides that little snafu though, this continues an interesting take on the Amazon. We find out in this issue that Diana wasn't made from clay after all and that her mother actually had an affair with Zeus himself to conceive her. The story of lust and keeping it hidden from bards and Gods alike takes up a bit of the issue as is building to it and resolving it. This issue is sadly a bit of filler and makes me question why did WW ever go to Paradise Island in the first place when she just turns around and leaves. I'm still invested in this story after the first two issues, but this one added nothing beyond giving WW a daddy and showing angry Amazons. Thankfully the art is still wonderfully done and I am invested from before. 3/5

Witch Doctor #4 - what a fun ride this book has been! With this issue our good doctor and his lackeys fight Cthulhu's Deep Ones in only a way a doctor of the occult could. This issue is also the first to start tying things together, showing the greater world outside of the occult medical emergencies and start to thread it all together. This is the final issue of this series, with a one shot coming out shortly and another series to follow shortly. If you haven't been reading this I highly recommend picking up the trade when it is released since odds are your comic shop criminally under ordered this. 5/5

comics review 11/16/11

This is a quick pellet review of superhero comics released world wide today. The review is from the top of my head and written on the train ride to work after reading them before.

Batman #3 - This book should be titled Detective Comics, Batman is in pure detective mode throughout as both he and we discover more and more about the Order of the Owl and its ties to both Gotham and the Wayne family. I can't discuss too much more without breaking down the mystery itself which is well done and building so perfectly. There is little action to the book and I could care less honestly. The artwork is strong and goes from being the right kind of moody to showing the light of Bruce Wayne perfectly. 4/5

Justice League #3 - Now this was a fun and entertaining comic. While Green Lantern keeps acting like a tool with Batman, Superman, and the Flash kicking ass and acting professional during their fight with the Parademons, the bulk of the issue focuses on Wonder Woman and the creation of Cyborg. The Wonder Woman stuff is great and shows off both her compassion and bad assness which is very welcome. When Wonder Woman joins the fight there is some good interactions with the characters which makes up a lot for the decompression feel of the story. The character who appears on the final page, and how they proclaim they should be leader made me smile and want to read the next issue. The art is well, it is Jim Lee, it is well done and dynamic, exactly the quality you expect. 5/5

Nightwing #3 - we continue to dig deeper into Dick's past with the circus while dealing with the death of the owner and apparent life long protector of Dick. Dick seems to be one to run from his past a bit or so is accused as such by former friends. It is a very interesting look at the most under explored side of his life, the circus life outside of just his family. While Nightwing's fight in the middle of an issue with a former circus friend now turned hitman/hitman liaison, was pretty well thought out and artfully done it left me a bit baffled. I take it the guy knew it was Dick in the suit, I mean he grew up with the guy and it isn't hard to tell otherwise with that mask if you know Dick Grayson, but why did they fight? Just because he didn't want to admit he didn't know who it was who killed the circus owner? Seems forced for the sake of needing a fight scene and introduce a (throw away?) character who has ties to the main character's past to add some "depth". The character interactions are what makes this issue worth while, the people of the circus feel like fleshed out characters and the flashbacks work well to strengthen that. The reveal of who hired the killer is a bit out of a procedural cop show, but still works for the purposes of the story. The artwork is well done and capably shows Nightwing flying and fighting while also working well for all the character work being done. 4/5

Red Hood and the Outlaws #3 - This book continues to read as fan fiction gone wrong. We are without random Starfire sleeping with people or her being more scantily clad, but it still is far from a good or compelling issue. Apparently Arsenal has been suicidal for years now, and once tried to use Killer Croc as a means of suicide, what!?!? This kind of stuff made me not care for the character in the first place, so not happy it continues. Also confused how he was Green Arrow's sidekick when it seems like GA is still new to the game in his own book. Really the only thing that was enjoyable in the issue were the last few pages featuring a young Jason Todd as Robin being too sick to go out on patrol, it is heartwarming and the opposite of what I would ever expect from this book. 1.75/5

X-23 #17 - when did this book become so much fun? X-23 (or Laura) is hanging out with Gambit who is back to being a charming and dangerous Cajun once again, she has an odd but flirtatious relationship with Hellion who doesn't come off as a complete tool while still keeping some of his assholish qualities, and she now baby sits for the Future Foundation! The story is pretty simple, discussion of the previous adventure and other issues of the past are discussed, Hellion and Laura have an aggresive and odd flirtatious fight/discussion, Gambit acts all suave and bad ass, and then Laura meets with the Invisible Woman and starts baby sitting for Franklin and Val Richards who just want to use a small nuclear explosive to go back in time to pet a dinosaur. What follows is traditional Adventures in Baby Sitting fair, a boy (Hellion) wants to come over, the kids get into trouble (something big and scaley arrives via Val's messing around with technology) and the parents are currently none the wiser. The cover even is an homage to the movie Adventures in Baby Sitting which is what made me pick up the issue in the first place. Speaking of the art, it is great. The painted style works so well for the book and the characters are crisp and the facial expressions are spot on making the dialogue superfluous at times to read the book. The pure fun and the interesting interactions in the book make me want to read more which is saying a lot of a book about the female clone of Wolverine. 5/5

The Twice Dead Man Part Four

Part 4: Times Gone Past

The man ran down the street, fighting to not stumble as he was too exhausted from the chase. Two men had started herding him through the alleys and streets. He had been out too late, drank too much, and these men were skilled. The man jerked his head back, trying to see if he happened to have lost the men. He hadn't seen them for a few minutes now, so many twists and turns had him so lost, hopefully they were just as confused and lost, the man hoped. The man stopped and pressed against a brick wall, taking a much needed breather. It took a few seconds before he felt the warmth of the blood seeping against his skin, soaking his shirt. He never felt the sharp blade, he thought that very odd.

He awoke sometime later, tied down to a metal table with leather straps pinning down his arms and legs. His chest throbbed in pain, a purple hue shimmered where his chest should have been.

A man in a lab coat peered into view with a smile. “You have awoken finally, don't worry the worst of it is already over. The radioactive compound in your chest succeeded in bringing you back and should give you a nice long second life, 100 years at least. Now this next bit may hurt a bit, I'm not sure if you feel pain anymore,” the man then pulled out a bone saw and his patient passed out before the blade ever touched his skin.

The next time the man woke up he was walking through the streets and wrapped in a trench coat. He lurched forward and was unable to control his extremities. He launched himself into a giant wooden door, turning it into splinters, a man was in the house who jumped to his feet in terror and tried to run away. He didn't make it far before the purple hued man killed him with his bare hands. It wasn't until he left the home before he could feel the warm blood on his fingers. He still couldn't control his movement, heading back towards the lab he was sure, but no clue how he knew where it was.

This continued for several nights, he would be tested upon in the lab and then with no control over himself he would go about wreaking havoc upon some stranger. One night while he was eliminating another stranger, a burst of electricity ran threw him, granting for a few short moments control over his body. He was so disoriented it took him nearly the whole fleeting time to actually take a few steps on his way outside and to freedom. A painful surge went down from the top of his spine on down and control was taken away from him once again.

“I'm afraid I don't know much else Dhargey, the nights out are dream like, I can barely remember any particulars, just my time there in the lab.... Wait I remember something else, behind the smiling man in the lab coat stood someone, standing far behind him. Watching intently and without expression, I only saw his face once, it looked inhuman, like some horrible accident had torn into his face.”

The Green Lama nodded, “it is alright my friend, that is enough. We shall go after these men, and stop the evil they are committing.”

Old NaNoWriMo Steampunk Thing

This is a short thing from a past NaNoWriMo that I thought I would share. Set in a steampunk China, it is the start of the long war between China and Japan in the late 1800s, but you know more steampunky.

We woke before sunrise in preparation. My platoon gathered our weapons and neared the front line in anticipation of the Japanese forces. There ships were seen landing on shore the evening before and an attack was imminent. At dawn we all prayed to the Gods for safety and victory, it was the last time I saw many of my men smile. A little bit after dawn we saw the first enemy banner. Seven large boats that moved across the earth came forward.

One of their soldiers carrying a banner rode a horse close to us. He was obviously unarmed so we allowed him to move but watched the walls closely. Every last gun in our possession was set on this man and the land ships behind him.

The man cried out, “We ask that you put your guns away and surrender peacefully. Give praise to our he Emperor and we will let you live.”

The men were sure it was all a ruse and laughed. The soldier yelled out, “Very well” and then returned to the seven land ships. The ships were out of our range... not that I think it would have mattered, not with what was on them.

The front of the massive land ships opened and huge armored behemoths walked from them. They spewed out steam as they moved, obscuring themselves. These machines were the size of three men and the earth itself shook as they moved toward us. I could hear fearful remarks from my men. I ordered them to hold themselves, do they not remember who they were? Once the first machine was within range we fired a lobby of shots. Heat filled the air as our bolts flew forward. I remember holding my breath, waiting for the steam to clear. Surely 100 shots would reduce the machine to rubble. These things seemed to have no ranged attacks, we would have this whole battle won in minutes.

Then I saw the machine continue to lumber forward. It hesitated for a second then picked up speed. The steam behind it increased as it raced towards my men. We fired shot after shot, our best weapons were fired at this thing and it barely slowed. Cannons made direct contact with the monstrosity, our attacks only succeeded in killing our spirits.

When the machine made it to us my men were already scattering. Many of the platoons were already in chaos. Any that weren't soon were. Their machine ran through several soldiers, leaving puddles of blood where they once stood. The thing's arms would reach out and strike down men with no issue. Steam continued to pour out of it causing even more confusion as men tried to fight or flee. I tried to call for retreat, not that it mattered anymore.

I started to flee, grabbing one of my men who was either too stupid or scared to move. We made our way back towards the camp as another machine appeared from the mass of steam. It had a giant sword in it's arm, it was shaped like a katana and it sliced easily through soldiers. The soldier I was with was decapitated by the blade. I threw my weapons down and tried to show the machine I was no longer armed. The monstrosity looked my way, or at least faced me and then quickly went away from me continuing it's attack.

About ten minutes later I had made it away from that field of death. A handful of our men were there to meet me and a few more staggered in afterwards. Soon the battle field cleared of steam and we saw the amount of death those machines had caused. Hundreds of men were mutilated. As the highest ranking officer left alive and in the area, I was the one who agreed to our defeat. These machines will be the end of us. They are unstoppable.

Signed Sergeant Yao Tsing 4th Platoon of the Silver Army

The Silent Ballad of Doctor Teeth

James is yelling again, I can’t recall why. He is being too loud. If I could build the courage, I would beg him to quiet down. I can’t, I can’t make the slightest of noises. If James continues being so loud, he will come. He is the reason I am so quiet. He demands my silence; or would, if he ever spoke.

His name is Dr Teeth, and he has taken care of me for as long as I can remember. Whenever bad things happened, he would step in. With a big smile, he just came along and fixed it all. My father, who yelled and beat me, the huge dog that lived next door who snarled and bit me, my abusive ex boyfriend... he took care of each one.

James bellows something that makes me look up. A forehead peeks around the door frame behind James; a giant grin slowly follows. The smile is full of yellow teeth, the grin distracts from the rest of his nightmarish face. My gasp rings through my ears, but James ignores me, still screaming in anger. I try to use my eyes to plead with him. Dr Teeth doesn’t like noise; the last thing I want is….

Behind James, Dr Teeth creeps forward. Every movement made is silent, slow and exaggerated. James slams his fist into his hand. His punches are loud, fast, and expressing his anger. He tells me my puppy dog eyes won't be enough this time. My eyes dart between the two moving figures. As Dr Teeth nears James I do the unthinkable, I very meekly say, “please be quiet”.

James reaches back to slap me. Before his hand moves to hit me his whole body is spun around. Dr Teeth quickly, elegantly, quietly, moves his arm in an arc. The sound of blood gurgling from the wound echoes through the room. James falls onto the couch next to me, his throat cut cleanly. The blood spills onto my lap. I try to remain silent. Dr Teeth cleans off his switchblade, his smile reflecting in the shimmer of the metal.

When things in my life get too loud and scary, Dr Teeth comes along to save me. The first time he to my rescue, my father was found hanging in the bedroom, his belt around his neck... the neighbor's dog had his head crushed by a giant rock... my ex boyfriend was..... oh God, not again.

I look up at Dr Teeth through tear soaked eyes, his grin is gone and he's shaking his head at me. His cold finger touches my lips; he wants me to be quiet. I can't take it anymore. I'm tired of controlling myself for him. My crying gets louder, I wail, all the years of silent obedience are released. I scream so loud the apartment shakes. Dr Teeth is taken aback, there seems to be a look of confusion on his face. I stop crying and look up at him. He cocks his head to the side taking an appraisal of me. His grin slowly creeps its way across his face.

Shaking, I stand up. Dr Teeth is still watching me, his ugly grin glowing at me. I open my mouth and scream. The apartment shakes. I fall back onto the couch. I let the tears pour out. I remain loud as possible, releasing my frustrations.

Dr Teeth thrusts his arm out, there should be sound as the switchblade opens. Dr Teeth never makes any noise. He puts a finger to his lips, his other hand swinging down. The sharp blade swoops towards me. He finally makes a noise.

SSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

The Twice Dead Man Part Three

Part 3: The Strength of the Green Lama

Two giant hands slammed against the Green Lama's cloaked head, hammering him into the ground. Before he could pull himself together he was slammed into again as the purple hued creature shoved its weight into him sending him flying back again.

While Dhargey had spent most of his life learning the ways of Buddhism and the mystical arts, he still had little experience in physical combat. He usually abhorred the use of violence, and only went to it as an absolute last resort, knowing sometimes he had to make such sacrifices for the greater good. Nonetheless, he had learned that his increased strength whenever his strikes did land stopped fights easily. It also helped that he could fly.

He flew up into the air, above where the inhuman thing could possibly reach him. The Green Lama then quickly turned and flew down into the creature, knocking him hard through the fence and into a wooden pole. The thing quickly jumped up and leapt towards the Green Lama who flew up again and then slammed his feet and body downwards.

The crash to the ground shook everything around where it landed causing the wooden pole behind it to crack and break. The power line it held up fell to the ground, creating giant sparks to fly across the ground. The Green Lama lowered into sight of the creature, electricity streaking behind his cape.

The creature let out a shriek of terror, it took a second for the Green Lama to realize it was the leaping sparks that frightened the beast. Calmly, he spoke to the creature, “I won't let it hurt you anymore, just let me help you...please.”

The purple light seemed to dim around the creature as it visibly shook, “hurt... ” it muttered.

Then a pulse seemed to hit it, knocking its head to the side forcing it to its feet. The creature slowly moved towards the Green Lama, its pace quickened to a mild jog which was easily dodged. The ground moved as the creature and the power line met, electricity surging through the frightened thing. A few seconds later the power line, the creature, and the city around them had gown quiet and still. The Green Lama moved towards the now pale creature he once thought was a revenant with a gloom look on his face.

The creature now looked all too human and laying breathless softly spoke, “Help me, please.”

Green Lama looked down upon the creature with pity and guilt, “Of course my friend, let's get you out of here before the police arrive. You can explain what is going on, and who has been hurting you and forcing you to kill.”

The man like creature slowly nodded, “they killed me and brought me back...forced me to murder for them...they must be stopped.”

The Twice Dead Man Part Two

Part 2: The Glowing Monster of the Streets

Dhargey stood over his small bed and looked over the sprawled out items that covered his sheets. Collected on the meager bed were magical items collected over the many incarnations of his past lives. From the Gauntlets of the Whispering Monk to the Horn of Ajuna, many items had come into the possession of the Protector of Buddhism. Through each life, he strives to help others find enlightenment and protect the innocent from the external evils that threatened them. Tonight that evil was a revenant.

Morris Klaw had been the one to surmise the creature's identity and how to track it. Morris had found Dhargey on his twelfth birthday, the day he found out that he was the reincarnation of the Green Lama, the anonymous defender of the people, so called for the green prayer robe he wore while taking on the various evils that faced Tibet and the world, especially those of the supernatural kind.

Dhargey collected the items he would need, and put them into the pouches on his belt making sure to carefully check each one closed properly. Soft whispers of a long dead language passed his lips, once he finished speaking the words the spell was complete, concealing his face in shadows from any who may wish him harm. He then put on his green cloak and slid the hood over his head. Finally after speaking the prayer, “om mani padme hum,” which grants him the ability to fly and gains superhuman strength, Dhargey had completed his transformation into the Green Lama. Slowly lifting off the ground, the Green Lama flew out Dhargey's apartment window and focused on the locater spell Morris Klaw had cast so the revenant could be found.

There were a few common tactics to stop a revenant, try to reconnect it with its humanity so you can reason with the creature's soul, encircle it with salt and then use the proper rites to release the soul from the revenant, or burn the remains when it is docile. The Green Lama had brought a bag of salt to trap the beast if reason would not work. To help him reach the creature's human soul, he had put on a bracelet composed entirely hairs of a conclave of priests called the Grinning Confiders. While very fragile, the accessory has been known to help calm down anyone who hears the wearer speak.

The creature was wearing a trench coat and a hat as it approached a large, quiet house. Landing between the creature and the gate, the Green Lama spoke gently.
“Listen to me. I know you are a bit confused, and angry, whatever these people did to you was wrong and you have suffered. But, I can't let you hurt anymore people.”
The revenant paused and blinked at the Green Lama, it gazed upon him in a perplexed manner.

The Green Lama gave the revenant a soothing smile and continued, “Just listen to my words. You were a person before, just because you were forced from this life does not mean you must seek vengeance. You can talk to me, and we can make sure whatever evil thing these people did is brought to light. There can still be justice without any more...”

The revenant convulsed until words fought there way from its mouth, “They made me.... into this... help me....”.

The creature grabbed its head and let out a loud scream, knocking the hat from its head. It hunched down in pain, then suddenly it sprung upright and gave a look of pure hate. The revenant lunged forward, the Green Lama quickly leapt backwards knocking against the black iron gate behind him.

The Green Lama grabbed a pouch from his belt and poured salt across the ground in front of him. Since reason seemed to fail, he would just trap the revenant and help its soul gain peace using other means.

The revenant neared the salt and easily stepped over it, shoving its whole entire mass into a single punch that sent the Green Lama right through the iron cast gate.

The Green Lama's cloak was enchanted to protect the wearer from a hit as mighty as a kick of the strongest horse from the Mongolian Steppes, yet he had felt the creature's punch. Desperately trying to catch his breath as he stood up the Green Lama was sure of two things, whatever the creature in front of him was, it wasn't a revenant, and it was about to hit him again...